Dr. Daniel Siegel describes several patterns of functional and dysfunctional parenting that establish later responses akin to PTSD. The first group is children who are fortunate enough to have secure relationships with responsive parents (about two-thirds). In these cases, the little child cries when the parent leaves, but settles down to explore and play after a few min-utes. About 20 percent of young children have an avoidant response to their parent coming and going. The parent pays little attention to the child, so the child is unmotivated to relate to the parent.
About 10-15 percent of young children have ambivalent attachments to their parents. This is because the parents are inconsistent in their attention to their child. Sometimes they are interested, and sometimes not. Recent research has revealed the existence of a small group of children (about 10 percent) who have disorganized patterns of relating with the parent. These are the situations where the parents are drug addicted or otherwise severely handicapped in relating to an infant or small child, even appearing afraid of the child at times. Children with these types of parents are prone to uncontrollable crying, running from the parent, and still trying to approach the parent. These dreadful scenarios are, of course, difficult to overcome when trying to form normal adult relationships.
Prior to the Vietnam War, soldiers who came back with mental difficul ties were said to have “shell shock.” Now it is more completely understood that PTSD is a broader experience, including a wide range of types of human trauma.
Precipitating Events
Events that leave a person with a sense of horror and helplessness are the types of occurrences that may cause PTSD. Some of these traumas could be as follows:
- Natural disasters-fires, floods, hurricanes
- Spousal abuse
- Rape, sexual assault
- Robbery, shooting, mugging
- Child abuse-verbal, physical, sexual
- War experiences
- Car or plane accident
Any of these events are sufficiently unnerving that the brain may grapple with them in the form of PTSD. How a person responds depends somewhat on whether or not other stressors were present before the current trauma.
More stressors create more vulnerability. Other factors influence the person’s response as well-age and the presence or absence of personal and community support.
CBT for Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder
By yourselt or with a therapist, you must try to sit with the emotions and fragmented bits of memory that are accessible. Think of it as a puzzle, and the initial images are suggestive rather than literal. you are able to sit still with the intense fear associated with the traumatic occurrence, more pieces of the puzzle will shift into place, perhaps over a period of time. With more conscious information available, the emotions subside.
Persons struggling with this type of PTSD often benefit from sitting still during the intense emotions and imagining a safe place to be. With practice, the adult lets go of the terror of human attachment and moves into full relationship maturity. Without such step-by-step practice, many persons who have had troubled childhood attachments are unable to relate normally as adults. The fear of the inconsistent or abusive parent becomes projected onto the closest relationships in adult life, creating much confusion and unhappiness.
One way to determine if you have attachment diffculties originating from intensely dysfunctional parents is if you are unable to remember much of your childhood at all. For example, a woman was sure that her childhood and teen years were fairly normal and typical until she remembered in a therapy session an incident where her father came home drunk and chased her with a butcher knife, all the while hurling obscenities at her because her clothing was too suggestive.
With a therapist or on your own, it is possible to sit with the emotions and thoughts of the original or current trauma and realize that the thoughts, images, and feelings will not debilitate you. Facing them takes away the power. It is common for sufferers of PTSD to want to avoid the types of situations that are similar to the trauma. However, this ends up creating a constrained existence. Facing the situation and all that accompanies it enables you to become free.
Working with Dreams
Sometimes the subconscious mind is more forthcoming with parts of the PTSD puzzle than the waking mind. It helps to keep a dream journal, even if everything about the dream seems frightening and intensely negative. Gathering parts of the puzzle will eventually create an integrated whole, as the mind settles down and there is less fighting against the terrifying images.
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